American Civil War fought in the space future

lwhitehead wrote:I'm working on this right now, if I do an novel series about my American South/English Star Empire Solider series I don't want to turn into Starship Troopers.

Since I modeling my Character on Robert R Lee,


LW

The dawnlight illuminated the town of Goodlands as the train pulled into the station, floating above the magnetic tracks that let it cover distances almost at the speed of sound. As the train came to a stop, settling slightly onto its wheels as the levitation effect dissipated, the one person waiting on the platform, an old man who was tanned and weathered from years of hard work, pulled himself to his feet and stepped away from the bench, his eyes darting between the opening doors as he searched for the person he had come to meet.
“Uncle Henry!”
The old man smiled as he raised one hand in greeting to the uniform-clad teen. “Edward! It’s about time you got here, you little whippersnapper. Then again, I’m sure escaping Tidewater Academy was a task and a half. ”
Edward grinned as he activated the hovertech in the base of his trunk. As the trunk rose enough that he could grab it by the pull-handle, the name Edward Robert Lee briefly caught the light.
“Did you bring your old jalopy?”
“Damn thing broke down again. Still fabricating a couple of new pistons for it.” Henry grumbled as his nephew walked up to him. “Had to get one of those newfangled hovertaxi things. It don’t even have a real driver, just a speaking box. T’ain’t natural.”
Edward managed not to laugh, but it was a close-run thing as he and his ornery uncle exited the station and moved to where the yellow autocab was waiting.
“Is mum still at the farm?”
“Yep, and her cooking’s improved now she ain’t usin’ that darned protein-printing doohickey.” Henry replied, staring blankly at the autocab’s boot. Edward reached out and double-tapped it, causing it to open up and earning a sigh from Henry.
“How did you even know how to do that?” He grumbled. “What’s wrong with a good old-fashioned lever or button?”
“Never mind, uncle.” Edward chuckled as he floated his trunk into the boot, switching off the hover-system in order to settle it in the luggage compartment. Stepping back, he waited for the boot to close, then walked to the hatch for the passenger compartment.
“Uncle, you coming or are you going to walk back?”
“Cheeky brat.” Henry grumbled as he rejoined his nephew. “Goes and joins the military academy, graduates and suddenly he isn’t respecting his elders any more.”
Edward had to bite his fist to stop himself from laughing at his uncle’s constant complaints as the autocab lifted off, turning in order to take them to the Georgian-style manor that the Lee family had called home for several centuries.

lwhitehead wrote:Hey it was rough and done on the fly, I can write.

lwhitehead wrote:I can't figure out in these forums how to add a proper writing to this forum,
LW

lwhitehead wrote:Hey it was rough and done on the fly, I can write.

I can't figure out in these forums how to add a proper writing to this forum,

“This sentence has five words. Here are five more words. Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety. Now listen. I vary the sentence length, and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this, it is important.

So write with a combination of short, medium, and long sentences. Create a sound that pleases the reader's ear. Don't just write words. Write music.”

The E wrote:Writing is a combination of skillsets. One skill is storytelling: The ability to take an idea (for ideas are cheap) and spin it into a tale worth reading or listening to. You have so far not demonstrated this in any meaningful way.
The other skill is "technical" writing, by which I mean the ability to construct sentences that not just convey the story, but through their structure communicate the flow of the story.

--[SNIP]--

Finally, and I apologize for harping on and on about this, but grammar and syntax aren't optional. As a writer, words and sentences are the tools of your trade; just as a craftsman who treats his tools with disrespect is likely to be incompetent, so is a writer who thinks that certain writing (like, say, forum posts) is not worth spending any effort on.

Abandoned Story Concepts
Compcent (Sci-fi/4 chapters) - A resurrected astronaut and an alien computer return to Earth after World War III.
Cyber Dragon (Sci-fi/3 chapters) - Technology can perform miracles, even supplying new bodies, albeit ones that are not human...
Pridelands (Fantasy/2 chapters) - An expansionist empire discovers that it may not be the strongest nation after all.
Angel Flight (Sci-fi/6 chapters) - A scientific experimental subject gets transported to a new world where he must make a new life for himself.
Guardian Monster (Sci-fi/9 chapters) - An runaway teenager makes first contact with a stranded alien scout.
Devil's Island (Fantasy/8 chapters) - A noble demon seeks to resurrect ancient races in the modern era.

Michael Everett wrote:Even though I do have completed stories on-line, my fails outnumber my completions.