Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.

I'm sorry, please do forgive me, but the insane humor of this passage is just simply and utterly not lost on me...

"Hyper footprint! We have major hyper footprints directly astern and at system north and system south," Andrea Jaruwalski reported. "Designate these forces Bogey Two, Bogey Three, and Bogey Four! They're accelerating in-system at five-point-zero-eight KPS-squared."

"Very well," Honor said calmly.

She leaned back in her command chair and crossed her legs, stroking the plushy fur between Nimitz's ears.

The woman has just been mousetrapped by Tourville but remains calm enough to just lean back, cross her legs and rub her furry pussy! She's really planning to get off on this kill.

Get your mind outta the gutter. I'm talkin' 'bout her cat! lol

What a Manticorian imagines when he hears a Grayson talking about stealing a base:

pokermind wrote:What a Manticorian imagines when he hears a Grayson talking about stealing a base:

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I beg to differ. I always found stealing a treble (all three bases) the most difficult.

Just in on tickle tape...

The MAlign has attacked half of the Shell systems with a new variant of Oyster Bay. HD has satirised and headlined it as, yep...

Oysters On A Half Shell.


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The Grapevine also has it that they apparently have Beowulf in their sights as well.

Stealthy Flyers sent out all over are indicating a massive...

Clam Bake.

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cthia wrote:

cthia wrote:A treecat, hexapuma, peak bear and a gremlin became friends after the Yawata strike, vowing to avenge their fallen comrades should the two-legs ever reveal the face of the enemy. They vowed to live together in this unlikely band of heroes and had set up home deep in an uncharted Sphinx forest with plenty to hunt surrounded by beautiful acreages of wild celery patches.

Their friendship became deep and they often argued over who's the toughest.

"I'm the baddest mother-freakin' killer on the face o' the planet and ye all know it," said the hexapuma.

"Hrmmph, I'd have you for lunch and be pickin' ma teeth while starin' at Gremly over there," growled the peak bear.

"It's after midnite y'all, don't mess with Gremly after midnite," the Gremlin snarled."

Having said their peace they all turned to the unspoken treecat.

"Ok then," flattening his ears, "I'd kill all of you bitches for tearing up my celery patch! WHAT!"

Cthia wrote:Treecat: "Hey Hexy. You Pumas really are some tough SOBs. How do you train?"

Peak Bear, Gremlin: "Yea, how do you train?"

Hexapuma: "When a Puma turns adult, we dress him as a Marine, apply camouflage to his body and take him to a bar."

"Huh," answers the crowd.

Hexapuma: "Sooner or later this human called a Harkness always comes in. Seems waving dress blues in front of that SOB is worst than waving red in front of a bull. You may survive the horns. But you're sure to get trampled and stomped. That's a nasty mean fucking critter. Trained many a Puma. The ones that survived the encounter anyways."

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Revisiting this unlikely band of vigilantes...

"Oh no, I knew we shouldn't have gone off all half-cocked looking for the MAlign. Now we're surrounded by all of these mean looking genetically engineered creatures. What are we going to do now?" asked the Gremlin.

Somehow finding himself the leader of this outnumbered army of four, the treecat quickly found an answer. He turned to the healthy hexapuma and cut him fiercely with his claws. The peak bear, ever trusting the treecat, did the same, further injuring the strongest of their own ally.

Before the befuddled and panicked Gremlin could complain, behind his back there was a huge commotion and screaming. When the Gremlin turned around, the hexapuma had killed all of the Crazy 88.

"What happened?" asked the Gremlin.

"There's nothing more dangerous than a wounded hexapuma," said the treecat.

"Damn straight," said the peak bear recalling a similar experience.

cthia wrote:It is time to check in with our unlikely band of wanna-be heroes for an update.

< "Hey, we should so make some tough names for ourselves. You know, for effect," says the treecat. "I will call myself DIXON, because I am going to cut a demarcating line right down the middle of each Mesan encountered. Get it? Mesan & Dixon line?" >

"Well call me MERLIN," says the hexapuma. I'm gonna put a hex on 'em. Now you see 'em. Now you don't."

Peak Bear "What a bunch of Pussies! Since they like the sex trade so much. Call me TRIPLE X. I'm gonna just shove 'em deep down my throat!"

cthia wrote:
It seems a new ally has joined this unlikely band of heroes. A female treecat - a dame, who has more than a little hero worship for the Protector's Champion. She has brought with her a self-forged sword of her own, "the Sword of Dame-O-Trees." She calls herself the People's Champion.

And just like the champion of whom she has patterned herself, after capturing Detweiler, DameOtrees shall ask just one question...

< My Lord, do you want this man gutted or rutted? >

TBC

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Pirates have their own brand of in-house justice. When another pirate is accused of a serious crime, he is held in obeyance by a jury of his peers. It is called "booty duty."

Katherine Mayhew is 4'7"
Honor Harrington is 6'2"

This was Katherine at first sight

Katherine probably doesn't see any difference between Honor and the statue.

Mange: <When Forest Gump died, he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter said, "Welcome, Forest. We've heard a lot about you." He continued, "Unfortunately, it's getting pretty crowded up here and we find that we now have to give people an entrance examination before we let them in."

<"Okay," said Forest. "I hope it's not too hard. I've already been through a test. My momma used to say, 'Life is like a final exam. It's hard.' "

<"Yes, Forest, I know. But this test is only three questions. Here they are."
1) Which two days of the week begin with the letter 'T'?"
2) How many seconds are in a year?
3) What is God's first name?

<"Well, sir," said Forest, "The first one is easy. Which two days of the week begin with the letter 'T'? Today and Tomorrow."

<St. Peter looked surprised and said, "Well, that wasn't the answer I was looking for, but you have a point. I give you credit for that answer."

<"The next question," said Forest, "How many seconds are in a year? Twelve."

<"Twelve?" said St. Peter, surprised and confused.
"Yes, sir. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd …"

<St. Peter interrupted him. "I see what you mean. I'll have to give you credit for that one, too."

<"And the last question," said Forest, "What is God's first name? It's Andy."

<"Andy?" said St. Peter, in shock. "How did you come up with 'Andy'?"

<"I learned it in church. We used to sing about it." Forest broke into song, "Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me, Andy tells me I am His own."

<St. Peter opened the gate to heaven and said, "Run, Forest, Run!">

Mange

What does a treecat think to himself when surrounded by enemies?

FEET DON'T FAIL ME NOW!

Chief, "A Facebook Cartoon for Halloween:"



Mange, <The two-legs at home put up a sign, 'Beware of the Hexapuma,' to detour the youngling candy moochers.>

Happy Halloween, a Christian Holiday mocking the devil the eve prior to All Saint's Day for you rabid Bible thumppers out there:

Poker & Mange