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'TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE DUELING | |
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by cthia » Sun Jul 12, 2015 1:56 pm | |
cthia
Posts: 14951
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'Twas The Night Before Dueling
by cthia 'Twas the night before dueling and all thro' the house, Not a creature was strirring, save Pavel the mouse, Stockings weren't hung by the chimney with care, But alarms and monitors and traps every where. Young wasn't nestled all snug in his bed, 'Cause visions of Salamanders danced in his head. Georgia in her 'kerchief, Stefan in his cap - Had just settled down for a long winter's nap. When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, Young soiled his pants tryin' to see what's the matter. Away to the window he flew like a flash, Drawing the shutters, and closing the sash. The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow, Cast shadows of Salamanders to objects below. It was just his old driver, so lively and quick, He knew in a moment he was going to be sick. When what to his frightened eyes should appear, But Honor on HD, with her tick and a sneer. More rapid than eagles his fears now they came, And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name: "I'll Bash-her! I'll Mash-her! I'll Prance on that bitch! On Murphy! On Angels! I'll scratch this one itch!" To the top of the stairs! To the top of the wall! He dashed away! dashed away! a-way from it all! Dry heaves after the wild hurricane flew His sickness had come, his nerves he did spew, And then in a twinkling, he heard on the roof, The prancing and pawing of each little hoof. As he drew in his head, and was turning around, Down the chimney a woodrat came with a bound: Dress'd all in fur, from his head to his foot, And his fur was all tarnish'd with ashes and soot; A bundle of joys was flung on its back, And he started to run, from pillar to crack: His eyes - how they twinkled! his dimples how merry, His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry; Young's little mouth was drawn like a bow, From forehead to chin - face white as the snow; A piece of a twig it held tight in its teeth, In the manner of an omen, in the shape of a wreath. Young's face was sad, with a knot in his belly, Hysterical laughter, legs shaking like jelly: The woodrat was chubby, a right jolly old elf, He laugh'd when he saw him in spite of himself; A wink of one eye and a twist of its head Gave Pavel to know he was soon to be dead. He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work, Pillaging the kitchen, and ignoring the jerk, Then laying his finger aside of his nose And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose. He sprang on his way, to his team gave a whistle, And away they all flew, like the down of a thistle: Young heard him shout, 'ere he got out of sight - "Merry Christmas from Honor, this will be your last night!" "But this is not Christmas! What do you know?!" "From Honor it comes early! Ye reap what ye sow!" . Last edited by cthia on Thu Mar 31, 2016 10:33 pm, edited 3 times in total.
Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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by pokermind » Mon Jul 20, 2015 12:57 pm | |
pokermind
Posts: 4002
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Chief, "Good poem Chita. Changing subject and verses Destroyermen Series Straits of Hell A Maa-ni-la Cav Cat riding a Me-naak:"
Art by Taylor Anderson the author of the series. Modified slightly by Pokermind. Link to Original art: http://destroyermen.wikia.com/wiki/File:Fifth_Maa-ni-la_Calavry_Trooper_by_Taylor_Anderson.png Mange, <What's the Honorverse connection?> "Genkis' Hexapuma cover criters have same type of shell. See:" http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fhonorverse.wikia.com%2Fwiki%2FGenkis&h=WAQGFwUJC Poker & Mange CPO Poker Mind and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.
"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART. |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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by pokermind » Sun Jul 26, 2015 8:06 am | |
pokermind
Posts: 4002
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Chief, "Toby from Japan says:"
Mange, <Terran cats are so weird!> Poker & Mange CPO Poker Mind and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.
"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART. |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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by pokermind » Sat Aug 01, 2015 11:19 am | |
pokermind
Posts: 4002
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Chief, "What will the League have when a POed Honor Harrington gets through with them?"
Mange, <I give what?> "Taunting. IE:" Poker & Mange CPO Poker Mind and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.
"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART. |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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by cthia » Sun Aug 02, 2015 9:20 am | |
cthia
Posts: 14951
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A beached officer should never remain silent.
He should make waves. Waves can get you off shore. Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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by cthia » Sun Aug 02, 2015 10:04 am | |
cthia
Posts: 14951
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The Grayson treecats are getting too domesticated. Three terrorists, still fuming about the Mayhew Restoration, attempted to attack Benjamin. They were met by three cats, albeit in a rather unorthodox fashion.
"Why did you use a vibro blade?," Benjamin asked one of them. <Are you kidding me Benjy. I just got my nails done!> "Why did you use a pulser? <I'm wearing a gown!> "You used your claws. But why cut him up into little pieces?" <I like jigsaw puzzles.> Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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by cthia » Sun Aug 02, 2015 10:07 am | |
cthia
Posts: 14951
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It went down a little something like this... "Father, you must allow me to join the navy! You must! You must! You must! You must!" "Quiet child. I shall pray to Tester for a sign."
"You set me up! You set me up!" "No father. I simply met my test." Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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by Dauntless » Sun Aug 02, 2015 11:40 am | |
Dauntless
Posts: 1072
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lol priceless |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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by cthia » Sun Aug 02, 2015 2:09 pm | |
cthia
Posts: 14951
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And if they served under Cordelia Ransom, would they be exempt, having already taken the course? Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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by cthia » Sun Aug 02, 2015 2:25 pm | |
cthia
Posts: 14951
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My next post is another parody, with roseandheather in mind. I should note, to give proper credit and for benefit of our international members that this was also a parody of an American classic 'Twas The Night Before Christmas. As my Honor at the Bat is a parody. viewtopic.php?f=1&t=2376&start=1032 Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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