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Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Wed Jun 04, 2014 11:31 am

cthia
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Human: "Marry a woman with an advanced degree and on red dollar days you get a bitch that thinks she knows everything."
Treecat: "Marry a memory singer with PMS and ESP and you get a bitch that does know everything."

What's the one thing Masadan women can count on receiving from their newly wed daughters?

Hate male.


How did the first treecats discover the colonists' greenhouses?

They were stalking them.


What is Victoria's secret viagra?
Woman: "A man's salary."
Treecat: "A man's celery."

Finally realizing that she had left Nimitz out of her bag of gifts, Elizabeth gave Samantha a pair of edible undies, spun from the finest virgin strands of celery.

Another group of Masadan women had commandeered a ship and had left Masada bound for the Star Empire. They were spotted and boarded by a bunch of mean but sickly pirates. The domination didn't take too well. Apparently the pirates had bitten off more than they cachoo.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Wed Jun 04, 2014 4:38 pm

cthia
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What do you call a treecat on a laxative?

Runsforcelery.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Wed Jun 04, 2014 6:01 pm

cthia
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Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

An old treecat that lost a foot in a battle with a hexapuma was nicknamed Forest Stump and he lived in the Sphinx forest with his best friend Bubba. Bubba loved to cook. Celery was his specialty...

Bubba: Anyway, like I was sayin', celery is the fruit of the jungle. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, saute it. Dey's uh, celery-kabobs, celery creole, celery gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There's pineapple celery, lemon celery, coconut celery, pepper celery, celery soup, celery stew, celery salad, celery and potatoes, celery burger, celery sandwich. That- that's about it.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by lyonheart   » Thu Jun 05, 2014 9:54 pm

lyonheart
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Hi Cthia,

This is terrible, horrible stuff; and you may have just joined Joe Buckley in red shirt territory. ;)

You'll never know when because of that Klingon proverb, "Revenge is a dish best served cold".

RFC may laugh when he first sees it, but you WILL pay for this one.

L


cthia wrote:What do you call a treecat on a laxative?

Runsforcelery.
Any snippet or post from RFC is good if not great!
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Thu Jun 05, 2014 10:07 pm

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

lyonheart wrote:Hi Cthia,

This is terrible, horrible stuff; and you may have just joined Joe Buckley in red shirt territory. ;)

You'll never know when because of that Klingon proverb, "Revenge is a dish best served cold".

RFC may laugh when he first sees it, but you WILL pay for this one.

L


cthia wrote:What do you call a treecat on a laxative?

Runsforcelery.


Naa. I've already paid for it. Comic is a dangerous job. If RFC didn't have a sense of humor he wouldn't have set up this forum.

About that red shirt. Seems I've been wearing one since I joined this forum. It has a bullseye on the back...apparently.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by Spacekiwi   » Sat Jun 07, 2014 4:43 am

Spacekiwi
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Posts: 2634
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Location: New Zealand

20 on him being a mesan in the next book on the recieving end of some Henke hijinks... . :D

lyonheart wrote:Hi Cthia,

This is terrible, horrible stuff; and you may have just joined Joe Buckley in red shirt territory. ;)

You'll never know when because of that Klingon proverb, "Revenge is a dish best served cold".

RFC may laugh when he first sees it, but you WILL pay for this one.

L


cthia wrote:What do you call a treecat on a laxative?

Runsforcelery.
`
Image


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
its not paranoia if its justified... :D
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sat Jun 07, 2014 9:42 am

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

:ugeek:
Spacekiwi wrote:20 on him being a mesan in the next book on the recieving end of some Henke hijinks... . :D

lyonheart wrote:Hi Cthia,

This is terrible, horrible stuff; and you may have just joined Joe Buckley in red shirt territory. ;)

You'll never know when because of that Klingon proverb, "Revenge is a dish best served cold".

RFC may laugh when he first sees it, but you WILL pay for this one.

L


cthia wrote:What do you call a treecat on a laxative?

Runsforcelery.

Oh guys! Do you really think it's possible? That I could actually be placed in his next book? That would be such an...honor. A Mesan is fine...just that much closer to Abigail, or Alice Truman!! Oh no, now ya went and done got ma hopes up. Revenge will be if it doesn't happen. :(

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by Michael Everett   » Sat Jun 07, 2014 2:14 pm

Michael Everett
Admiral

Posts: 2619
Joined: Tue Nov 03, 2009 3:54 am
Location: Bristol, England

cthia wrote:Oh guys! Do you really think it's possible? That I could actually be placed in his next book? That would be such an...honor. A Mesan is fine...just that much closer to Abigail, or Alice Truman!! Oh no, now ya went and done got ma hopes up. Revenge will be if it doesn't happen. :(

Be careful what you wish for.
On Babylon 5 fan won a competition to have a one-shot important-to-the-plot character named after him.
The character in question turned out to be a murderer with a multiple-personality-disorder.
...yeah...
~~~~~~

I can't write anywhere near as well as Weber
But I try nonetheless, And even do my own artwork.

(Now on Twitter)and mentioned by RFC!
ACNH Dreams at DA-6594-0940-7995
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by Spacekiwi   » Sat Jun 07, 2014 11:23 pm

Spacekiwi
Admiral

Posts: 2634
Joined: Sun Aug 07, 2011 3:08 am
Location: New Zealand

Hey, Look at joe buckley. it pays not to annoy BAen authors.....


But seriously, I think there is several people from here and/or the bar that have been written into RFC's books. http://www.davidweber.net/redshirts has some, but there may be more, as it stops at torch of freedom.


cthia wrote::ugeek:
Oh guys! Do you really think it's possible? That I could actually be placed in his next book? That would be such an...honor. A Mesan is fine...just that much closer to Abigail, or Alice Truman!! Oh no, now ya went and done got ma hopes up. Revenge will be if it doesn't happen. :(
`
Image


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
its not paranoia if its justified... :D
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Tue Jun 10, 2014 5:05 pm

pokermind
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Posts: 4002
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Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

Mange, <And now a blast from the past:>

JenBurdoo wrote:Three Grayson Navy chaplains are standing in their SD's observation lounge during the looooooong run in to battle, gazing at the stars and thinking about the Tester. One of them says to the others, "Brothers, at a time like this I feel moved to confess my sins. I am ashamed to own that I drink too much; in fact, I've got something of a hangover right now."

"I too am a sinner," says the second chaplain. "I lust for the flesh. In fact, I slept with one of our Manticoran loaner officers last night."

They both look sidelong at the third chaplain. "And you, Brother. Have you a besetting sin to confess?"

"Yes," says the third chaplain. "I have this terrible, unstoppable urge to gossip."


<Hmm sounds like cthia a terrible gossip :D >

Mange
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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