NortonIDaughter wrote:Jonathan_S wrote:
I just hope someone thought to unload and lock-out her finger pulser and set reasonable software overrides on the artificial arm.
Eeek, hadn't even thought of that! And cthia and crew dude think they had it bad.
Well I don't know about crewdude's doctor, but I do know that my sister's doctor would have taken the pulser shot for sure. And I know the exact moment he would have bought the farm.
"I'm gonna push!"
"No, you can't push now."
"No...mam, you can't push now!"
"Arrrrrggggggghhhhh."
"Breathe sis."
"Shut up!"
"Mam you're pushing!"
"WTF do you expect me to do?"
"Relax and await the proper time."
"THIS IS NO TIME TO BE PROPER YOU QUACK!"
It's a fact that this was his pulser moment.
He had told me that once he tells her to push, the baby could come fairly quickly. So I had initiated the zoom function on the vid-cam to capture it. Now I'm peering into Area 51 in zoom mode and I began to agree with sis, perhaps the doctor is a quack because Area 51 is showing pronounced activity!
"Doc you sure it's not time?"
"She hasn't dilated enough, a few more centimeters."
"Centimeters?" My sister's cavern is already open wide enough that I can insert my arm and pull the baby out myself! Yep, doc's a quack, he's still not conversant with the metric system!
I risk panning the camera to look at my sister's face to say breathe a bit more forcefully.
I thought better of it when I saw that her eye-balls were bulging inside sockets that had dilated more than her poo-nanny.
Apparently she realized she had my attention and began to throw 40-letter words at me to help her.
Trust me if you've never heard ten four-letter words programmed to arrive on target at the same time.
They are programmed for effect. I began to tremble which turned into a full-on shaking when she stopped swearing and mouthed at me between gritted teeth...
"You are going to die mister. Dead meat! Road kill!"
This is the point I asked for drugs for myself, after all Doc and I had built-up a working relationship, a rapport.
"Doc, you know those drugs my sister refuses. Any chance I can have them?!!!"
"Not a chance."
Now I thought about pressing the issue, but after seeing his face in Honor's dialed-up-like telephoto function I realized that he very well may be saving the drugs for himself, to take post-delivery all in one big massive dose. I conceded that possibility to the poor guy, It looked as though he needed it more than I.
Luckily he finally gave the order to push. Good thing too because the low-battery indicator was flashing on vid-screen. Of course it could have been a warning sign that sis' eye-sockets were going to erupt exploding-eye-balls or that Area-51 was going into full-on assault mode!
I was never happier to hear a baby cry!
All of this is recorded for posterity. It was my sister's intention to show this to my niece when she's old enough.
But I can't see any woman actually wanting to become with-child after seeing this video.
In fact, it could be shipped to over-populated countries as a certain guarantee against births.
Any man seeing it would just wear double covering or abstain altogether.
And there's no way any man would ever believe the information given out in Lamaze classes to venture anywhere near teeth of an unmedicated irate woman in labor!
Men should take away from this the knowledge that pregnancies are still going to happen.
Know that the doctor will refuse you drugs in the delivery room so be prepared and bring along your very own IV-drip of a couple of fifths of 151, for one Area-51.
Also know that if you do manage to smuggle in a single syringe of high-powered street-level drugs that you'll be caught undecided between administering said dose to yourself, the doctor or your partner!
NortonIDaughter, crewdude and I did have it bad.
The above is simply a small indication, that upon having Honor's weapons, of how quickly it would have gone from bad to worse!
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